In my childhood and adolescence, I lived a complex family situation and a difficult relationship with my mother. This led me to feel a certain instability and the feeling that there was something to solve. Sometimes, I thought that the others were luckier than I was and I wanted to be like them.
Growing up, I had continuously something like a lump inside me that I felt I had to do something with. I had to do something with this suffering – I had to solve it.
Then, at a certain point, I realized that it was not a matter of doing something against it, but instead of not rejecting it. For me it was a sort of Kierkegaardian leap, something that I felt strongly more than thought about it. The strong experience of going from the way things should be so to be happy (not feeling that pain, solving that situation, making that person change…) to how they really are, embracing the possibility that they can already be perfect as they are.
This Copernican revolution in my way of thinking allowed me to see how my suffering had been actually a gift. It is through this channel that people approach me, which they feel understood and welcomed. It is thanks to empathy that I can do my job, which I feel like a ‘mission’.
That’s why in coaching I use Positive Psychology and Self-compassion mindfulness – Two tools that together help to accept the various aspects of our personality and not to fight them, reflecting on what we can do with what we have (and not on what we should have).
The motto “Let frailties be your strengths” means repairing fractures with gold, creating something unique and unrepeatable, with its history and beauty, much more than an object that came out of the factory in series.